Tuesday, January 10, 2012

two years ago today...

two years ago today
     ...emergency surgery was preformed on Jason to start the process of removing infection that was taking over his body and was in the blood stream.  This type of infection kills over 80% of the people who get it when sepsis is already present at the time of hospitalization.  The doctor told me that night that if Jason were 20 years older he would be dead.  His age was the only thing he had going for him at the moment.  The doctor said that there was really no explanation for the infection and that it was just "bad luck".  Through God's grace I replied that although we didn't know why this was happening we did know who was allowing it to happen and that we had complete confidence in Him.

two years ago today
     ... I dared to imagine life without my husband.  I knew it was wrong.  I knew to think truth, but the doubts and fears were very real for 2 weeks as his life was touch and go.  I still have moments of fear and doubt about the uncertain future, especially since we know that God is moving us to the Philippines.  It is a very real fear of mine that God calls some to a life of trials to produce patience and enduring faith as a testimony of God's goodness for His glory.  I realize that since we experienced one trial doesn't mean we are exempt from any more.  While it's certainly a reality to me that life can change in an instant I know that God is unchanging and His grace will always be present.  

I haven't shared this photo with anyone yet.  For a long time I couldn't look at it.  I took this the first day in the hospital because Jason and I were relieved that he was there and had surgery and had some pain relief.  We didn't know here that this infection was still present and spreading and the next few weeks would be a fight for Jason's life and would be the most trying time of our lives.  

two years ago today
     ...we were allowed by our loving Father to experience a trial that in every way at every time caused us to glory in God.  He was real and working and powerful.  It was amazing.  We would never choose to experience a trial, but even now are thankful for it.


     Anytime God handpicks you to walk through a trial to help display His glory is a high calling.  I'm reminded when I reminisce about the past two years that God is bigger than me and my life and my trial, but may choose to use me for His glory in a way I'd never imagine or choose.  I'm comforted with the hope of eternity today as I parent my children, as I relate to my neighbor, and as I adjust to divine interruptions in my schedule.  The hope of eternity strengthens my faith not only in mundane tasks but also in great trial.  Every day is a gift from our Father and what He wills is our calling.


If you're interested you can read last year's post here.

13 comments:

Kelly Glupker said...

I can't believe it's been two years. I am praising the Lord over what He has done in you guys and through you. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. I struggle with the thought of losing someone in my family. After losing my mom to cancer I worry about how I would go on if I lost my husband or children. Thank you for reminding me that His grace is sufficient.

Stamped Here by Him said...

God's grace, his timing, and his love are all wonderfully displayed daily in your lives. So thankful to be able to watch.

Matt & Nicki said...

Every year, on January 10th, as Matt and I mark another year of marriage, you and Jason celebrate as well, but in a different and somewhat sobering way. You are and always have been, iron that sharpens iron! I love you, dear friend, and rejoice in the blessing that we BOTH get to share another day with our life's partner! Thank-you, again, for the reminder of the gift we have been given to simply live another day-- Miss you ALL!!

S said...

so thankful for God's grace in your life and taking time to recount the works of God...it's so easy to forget. and am so thankful that as we go through hard trials, our confidence in a faithful, gracious, loving God is strengthened...thankful for those that have been impacted from your Gospel testimony.

praying for you guys as you take another step of faith in going to the Philippines!

Ross Shannon said...

Rejoicing with you! Thanks for this reminder of God's grace.

Abram Curtis said...

Amazing! I'm excited to see how you guys impact the Philippines as you live out your incredible story.

michael whitcomb said...

had tears reading this. how good God is. you wrote of it so well. thanks for sharing!
Nina Whitcomb

Carrie said...

I was thinking it was only a year ago but time goes by so fast. Love you and your family and am thankful for your testimony and example as a mom, wife and Christian.

Hannah said...

Wow.. 2 years. What a miracle Beth! I remember that time so well just because I just had a baby too and I couldn't imagine going through all that you were with a new baby. God is so good!
I didn't know you guys are going to the Philippines. I would love to hear more about it if you ever have time. Thanks for being such a good example for me. I wish we lived closer and could get together more.

Mary Ann said...

Thank you so much for sharing about Jason's illness & how the Lord has been your strength. I remember as I was first married really stuggling with fear about how I would react if something happened to Mike. Such silly thinking but such an easy temptation to fall into. Knowing of your trial & how the Lord upheld you gives courage & strength to the rest of us. There's nothing better than knowing that we serve a God who is good, faithful, all powerful, & intentional. He does not act on whims or flights of fancy. He has a plan & He will establish His will in the lives of His children. I am so excited to see how He leads your family in the future as you minister in the Philipines!

Erin Neiner said...

Thank you for sharing this photo. No doubt you'd rather tear it up and not think about it another day of your life; but you are so wise in facing the foe and calling it a blessing (in disguise). John is teaching through James right now and it is enlivening my vision and perspective on trials. I cannot help but think of you guys---and now seeing the joy that it has produced. What a true gift. :)

Hannah said...

Hey- I am passing on the liebster award to you. Check out my blog today to find out what it means!

Susansweaters said...

God will always get you through the trials in your life.