family

I was looking though old pictures tonight and just had to post this video.   I'm so thankful for this bunch of people God has allowed me to share this life with.  They sharpen me and make me laugh.  I know more about Christ because I know them.  I love you Jason, Jonas, Ella, Kate, Isaac, Mom, Dad, Mark, Anne, Titus, Ezra, Simeon, Levi, Mark, Amy, Ian, Emmaline, Justin, Stephanie, and Max!

two years ago today...

two years ago today
     ...emergency surgery was preformed on Jason to start the process of removing infection that was taking over his body and was in the blood stream.  This type of infection kills over 80% of the people who get it when sepsis is already present at the time of hospitalization.  The doctor told me that night that if Jason were 20 years older he would be dead.  His age was the only thing he had going for him at the moment.  The doctor said that there was really no explanation for the infection and that it was just "bad luck".  Through God's grace I replied that although we didn't know why this was happening we did know who was allowing it to happen and that we had complete confidence in Him.

two years ago today

     ... I dared to imagine life without my husband.  I knew it was wrong.  I knew to think truth, but the doubts and fears were very real for 2 weeks as his life was touch and go.  I still have moments of fear and doubt about the uncertain future, especially since we know that God is moving us to the Philippines.  It is a very real fear of mine that God calls some to a life of trials to produce patience and enduring faith as a testimony of God's goodness for His glory.  I realize that since we experienced one trial doesn't mean we are exempt from any more.  While it's certainly a reality to me that life can change in an instant I know that God is unchanging and His grace will always be present.  

I haven't shared this photo with anyone yet.  For a long time I couldn't look at it.  I took this the first day in the hospital because Jason and I were relieved that he was there and had surgery and had some pain relief.  We didn't know here that this infection was still present and spreading and the next few weeks would be a fight for Jason's life and would be the most trying time of our lives.  

two years ago today

     ...we were allowed by our loving Father to experience a trial that in every way at every time caused us to glory in God.  He was real and working and powerful.  It was amazing.  We would never choose to experience a trial, but even now are thankful for it.


     Anytime God handpicks you to walk through a trial to help display His glory is a high calling.  I'm reminded when I reminisce about the past two years that God is bigger than me and my life and my trial, but may choose to use me for His glory in a way I'd never imagine or choose.  I'm comforted with the hope of eternity today as I parent my children, as I relate to my neighbor, and as I adjust to divine interruptions in my schedule.  The hope of eternity strengthens my faith not only in mundane tasks but also in great trial.  Every day is a gift from our Father and what He wills is our calling.


If you're interested you can read last year's post here.

Christmas

There are 13 of us in the house this Christmas.  It's cozy.  We are loving it.  Jason's parents and sister are here.  There is nothing better than family and I'm so thankful they can be here this Christmas.  We could NOT believe the piles of presents that kept accumulating under our tree.  We are really blessed, but keep in mind- 13 people!

BEST. GIFT. EVER.  = baby Emmaline

 We had to have a little photo shoot with our baby doll tonight since it's her first Christmas.

Aunt Elizabeth is staying in the girls room and they are loving their "sleepovers" and Ella's bed on the floor.  (Kate always sleeps on that little crib mattress and then shoves it under the big bed during the day.)

 best friends

Today at 4:50 (of course, minutes before hardware stores shut down for the holidays) we noticed a huge water leak in our basement.  Yep, the water heater busted.  That means 13 people are down to one toilet, no shower or tub, 1 bathroom sink, and 1 kitchen sink.  2 weeks ago our dishwasher broke (It's just because we went 4 years using it without a water softner).  So, I'm now doing dishes by heating water on the stove!  Fun Christmas memories are happening all around.  Tonight Jason and I posted the following on facebook.  At least we have our sense of humor and each other which of course is all that really matters.  We are blessed and no matter what curve comes down the road we have abundant grace for each moment.  We are joyfully celebrating our Savior this Christmas season!

by Jason:

Twas the night before Christmas
When all through the house
Not a drop of hot water
Yet the carpets were doused.

The water heater tank
had been cracked with such care
By rust and by age
Well beyond repair

And mamma in her kerchief,
and I in my cap
No showers for us,
Well, we're just going to stink tomorrow I guess.

my response:

Twas weeks ago, dear 
that our dishwasher broke
the replacement was me
and that's really no joke.

I thought I might get one
from old St Nick
but now I'm afraid
that we'll get a new water heater instead and until then I'll have to keep boiling pots of water on the stove just to wash my dishes by hand but I'm not complaining because at least I have running water and don't have to chop wood and haul pails of water from the creek out back

a full day

This morning started out with a traffic jam of eager children waiting with excitement for our trip to the apple orchard.  They rode their bikes around and around in circles for such a long time.  

 Isaac was adorable and I had to grab my camera.  He tries so hard to do everything that the big kids are doing and he pretty much succeeds.  He kept getting frustrated, but he kept trying to keep up.

I love his brand new big boy haircut.  I almost cried as I watched Jason cutting all of his hair off, but now I think he's so adorable.  I can't stop looking at him!

 More frustrations...  and YES, I did button his shirt wrong!  I didn't even know I did that until I looked at these pictures tonight.  I was so busy that I just grabbed something to put over his t shirt as he was following everyone out the door and quickly buttoned him up from behind the running kid!

 This is the kid hay maze at the pumpkin patch we visited today.  I didn't get many pictures of our adventure.

 I dislike posting pictures of me, but I'm glad Jason got one of me and half of the kids.  Like I said, I didn't get many pics.  No kids-all-together, no me and Jason, no family, oh well... there's always tomorrow! :)

 cutie Kate bug and her mischevious look

 Isaac was amazed by the tractor during the hay ride.

 Sweet sunshine Ella.

 hahaha!  Kate CANNOT get her left and right figured out.

 strange bumpy pumpkins

08.03.02

By God's design, nine years ago I married my friend.  We made promises to each other that we intended to keep for life.  By God's grace we are committed to being faithful to each other.  No matter what sin may snare us.  No matter what circumstances may overtake us.  No matter what.  We choose to love each other and meet each others needs selflessly.  As God willed I watched my husband suffer and come close to death.  I'm thankful each day for the gift of life.  By faith we will continue on this journey together.

At our wedding we signed this covenant of marriage before God and many witnesses:

As we marry, I commit to pursue this relationship in word, deed, and thought for the rest of my life.  In order to fulfill this promise, I give myself over to knowing God and His Word.  By growing in Christ, I will grow as your mate.  By learning of His love, I will learn to be more loving.


I commit to better myself as your life's partner.  I will not be content to love you as I presently do.  My love will grow as we mature.  I want to align my love with the Biblical definition.  I will especially dwell on replacing selfishness with selflessness and doubt with trust.  I will never stop in my effort to communicate with you.  I will not allow any excuses to block our communication.  I will improve my communication skills so that you might better understand me.  I will spend my life studying you so that I might better understand you.  I will deal with any specific communication flaws as soon as I am made aware of them.  As much as I will labor to communicate with you, I will do so with God so that I might better love you.  


I commit to be patient and longsuffering in my relationship to you.  By love, I will not allow anything to inhibit my relationship with you that God allows.  I will correct faults only as they benefit your Christian walk.  I will forgive immediately and absolutely.  I will always give you the benefit of the doubt concerning anything that might hurt me.  I will trust your judgement and love. 


I will seek to show my love for you in old ways that you desire and new ways that are creative.  I will never put you in a place where you are doubting my love.  I will express it verbally and non-verbally for the rest of our lives.  I will love you alone.  No one else will interfere with our relationship just as we will not interfere our relationships with Christ.  I will commit to Christ, then you.  There is no greater way to love you.


I promise to intertwine you in my life.  We will forever become one.  I will leave everything open in myself so that you may become part of it.  I will share all with you and will always be there for you to share with me.  I will forever participate in your life.  I will always seek to meet your needs.  I will forever love you.  

(written by Jason for us)

count your blessings...

name them one by one.

Thank you, Father for choosing to use me to mother these precious children.  Give me wisdom daily as I seek to teach and train them for your glory.  Help me to never be bothered, irritated, and frustrated by them or to view them as interruptions.  I want to rejoice in the privilege I have to spend and be spent for them as long as you allow.  

my home

After a long night of bad sleep (Jason being uncomfortable and baby waking several times) I need to counsel myself:

God created me.
God created me and all things for His glory.
My life is a vapor (a blip in eternity).
After this life is over I will spend eternity in heaven.
God is preparing a place for me to praise and know Him forever.


Jason has such a heavenly and worshipful perspective on the "suffering" that he's endured for all of 2010.  That's not to say that every now and then he doesn't wish for his old normal self back.  Next Sunday night Jason will preach on heaven at our church.  I'm anxious to hear him.  Perhaps God has allowed this physical pain for us to long for heaven more.  I want to spend my days meditating on the glories God has in store for us.  Hoping in Him will motivate right living and right thinking today.  I am starting to do a book study with a friend out of this book:

Jason is in the process of reading this book:

In what ways do you meditate on heaven, our home?  Why is it that it takes physical suffering, pain, and death to focus our perspective on eternity?  We are pilgrims on a journey and I'm afraid we are easily distracted and take many detours because we are looking down instead of up and straight ahead to see our destination.

nine months

How did this wee little one grow so fast?

He captures my heart, daily. 

Isaac is 30", and 21.9 lbs.  He won't sit still.  He lays his head on my shoulder for one brief and beautiful moment when I say, "go night-night", but otherwise he is kicking and squirming constantly.  Isaac has 6 teeth and says ma-ma and da-da noises, but doesn't really use them to identify us.  He makes a cute little pig sound and a growl that's really cute.  He waves good-bye and is learning to sign "please" and "all done".  Any ball is his current fave toy.  He's quite a little star in our youth group.  Yeah, he's loved. He's been on the New York missions trip and the creation museum trip so he's spent a lot of time with some of them.  Isaac smiles so easily so when he's greeted he always rewards you with a smile.  Isaac  RARELY sleeps through the night.  I don't get him out of bed (7:30 to 7:30), but he is stubborn and hasn't learned that his screaming (l-o-n-g and loud!) doesn't work.  He keeps trying.  Remember me saying that he won't stay still?  This has become an issue during diaper changes.  He flips over and tries to escape so fast- usually before the diaper is off.  This has resulted in discipline at this early age- gotta start young!  Along those same lines he is also learning "no touch".  Isaac recently discovered airplanes.  We live by a small airport.  We also live by a fire station and there are train tracks about a block away and police cars frequent our neighborhood.  Isaac has a lot of noisy vehicles to watch and listen to during the day!  He likes noise.  He is definitely a #4.  There is always plenty of activity here to entertain him.  He likes to make noise.  Is it any wonder that his favorite household appliance is the vacuum?  We will be celebrating one year before I know it!  I'm actually posting this 9 month re-cap on the day he is turning 10 months.  I'm also reminded that 9 months ago today I took Jason to the ER for a life altering 24 days in the hospital.  I'm thankful everyday for these 2 guys.  I cannot imagine life without either of them.  I think I have enjoyed God's good gifts in a new and exciting way this year.  God is good.  To Him be honor and glory forever.  

the rest of the story

Tuesday Jonas and I went to the consultation with a surgeon about his abscessed tooth.  I really didn't know what to expect and so I didn't tell Jonas that anything in particular would or wouldn't happen.  A little friend from church had told Jonas that he was going to have to have his tooth pulled and the dentist would yank really hard and it would hurt really bad.  Well, I told Jonas we would just wait and see what the doctor recommended and not worry about it.  It turns out that Jonas' little friend was right.  We had our meeting and the doctor said, "we need to do this now".  I've seen someone I love in a lot of pain this year and as hard as that has been, I just can't imagine watching your child go through pain.  Jonas was so brave and sat perfectly still with his eyes shut tight as tears were streaming down his little face as the doctor numbed the area with several shots.  The actual pulling was no big deal and it didn't really take very long.  Only a few hours later Jonas was completely pain free and back to himself.  I'm glad that's done!  However, the same thing is happening in the same spot on the other side.  It's not abscessed yet, but it could become infected.  I now have to set up an appt with a pediatric ortho for a space saver to be put in the side that was pulled and for something to be done to the opposite side (pulled or filled or something).  yuck... more money... more tears... NO FUN!

Wednesday during youth group we celebrated Jason and Mark's 30th birthday.  (I'm such a slacker and didn't even post about my amazing husband's 30th birthday- don't worry.  we celebrated.  He knows he's loved.  I don't have to post to show it- I don't even know if people read this! )  Amy put together a great slide show celebrating this year with Jason.  It was sweet.

Thursday we had a family birthday party and then Jason took the two older kids to our school's open house.  I can't believe I have a son in 2nd grade and Ella is starting K-5! It's not possible.  How can everyone else change and grow around me?  I'm not changing one bit :).  During their few hours away I took the 2 little ones (Kate and Isaac) and did some shopping.  We needed to get some last minute school supplies we couldn't find the other day.  It was very fun to spend some time with those two!  I know I'll enjoy my many hours with them while Ella is in school 3 days a week.  Kate is ready to start reading and it will be fun to work with her.

Jason is politely telling me to stop taking pics! :)

Ella waiting to go see her classroom and talk to her teacher at the open house.

Friday we went to the State Fair.  The Minnesota State Fair is amazing.  It's HUGE.  I can't describe it.  You'd just have to experience it!  It will definitely be something we'll always miss when we leave here someday.  We had a fun and exhausting day together as a family.

Saturday Jason was gone from about 8 to 1 with some church responsibilities.  Around 5 we got ready and went to a preseason Vikings game!  These people here are crazy passionate about their football team.  Everywhere we turned downtown there seemed to be a sea of purple and gold!  We had a great time with our double date- Mark and Amy.

Sunday afternoon I'm planning on a nap.  I'm hoping all the stars aline and all the children sleep or are quiet as church mice for a few hours.  Everything hinges on the baby.  Will he catch a little cat nap in the nursery?  Will he make it home without falling asleep in his car seat?  Will he eat a good lunch and then sleep for a few hours?  We shall see...

...in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, in joy as well as in sorrow...

This month we are celebrating 8 years of marriage.  

Jason officiated a wedding last night.  The bride was beautiful.  The groom was beaming.  Jason read the vows and they were repeated by the pair.  There were several times during the ceremony that Jason looked out across the crowd and caught my eye.  We shared a knowing gaze and my heart swelled. I'm sure that the significance of the vows they shared before God and we who witnessed was a reaffirmation for the many married couples there of their love for each other.  The congregation was not small and Jason usually doesn't catch my eye when he's preaching, but there is certainly something special about attending a wedding after you've experienced years of life together.  Here we are at 8 short years and so much has happened.  Our love is stronger now than it has ever been.  I enjoy each day.  I look forward to tomorrow and each day after that God allows us.  

31

Yes.  It's true.  I have been given another year.  I thoroughly enjoyed celebrating it today.

This morning when I woke up I sat in the living room taking care of Isaac while my sister made me coffee, got breakfast for the kids, did the girl's hair, and made sure the kids were dressed for the day.  Then during Isaac's morning nap she took the older three downstairs to her "house" and entertained them for about an hour while I took the longest uninterrupted shower.  It was so nice!  Jason's parents have been visiting from Portland this week and his sister is here from Guam.  They flew out today.  When they came by this morning to say goodbye they brought me a balloon, sweet card, and the beautiful flowers above.  (we are SO going to miss them!)

For lunch we walked to the park and Amy met us there with pizza and special drinks (sparkling flavored waters for the kids and Dr. Pepper for me!).  The kids gave me all kinds of treasures they found at the park. While I sat under a tree taking care of Isaac they enjoyed bringing me things and singing Happy Birthday to me each time they came over.  The treasures included the stick with leaves attached to the end that I could "shake" (on the table in the first picture), acorn shells full of clover leaves- supposedly the "best tea ever", a "sparkly" broken strand of mardi gras beads, 2 hair clips, a "cool" shaped broken piece of concrete, and a metal bolt of some sort that was "certainly unique" (says Jonas).  After the kids had a nap I captured the photos above that are precious to me.  We were looking for shapes in the clouds and Jonas was helping little brother, Isaac, sit up with the other kids.  (Isaac turns 6 months this week... amazing... tear. tear. tear.)  Ella and I played around making daisy chains and other nature things.  It was fun until Isaac started eating too much rufage :)

We went to our church's softball game tonight as a family.  They were playing at a field about 2 minutes from our house.  It was a beautiful day and the festivities will continue tomorrow evening when Jason takes me out.  Just the two of us.  I can't wait.

Has anyone tried the All American cake from COSTCO?  It's so good.  We get it on rare occasions.  We celebrated Father's Day early while Jason's dad was here this week since we were all together so this cake helped serve a variety of celebrations!  yum. yum.