The following is from the book Training Children by Gustava M. Wonderly copyright 1959.
Train your children to come to you, if possible, when they need you, instead of expecting you to come a distance while they stand where they are and shout, "Mother!" Kindly say, "Come here, please, and I'll help you." If you see that the child needs you to go to him, tell him you will come. He will delight to hear the words "I'm coming" or "I'll help you." He will, as he senses your love and interest, soon be answering you with the same kind tone and interest. The following lines of the poem "Speak Gently," from McGuffy's Third Reader, is valuable for parents as well as for children:
Speak gently; it is better far
To rule by love than fear.
Speak gently; let no harsh words mar
The good we might do here.
Jonas is by personality and possibly position as firstborn very demanding of my time and attention. He has always wanted to show me everything and tell me about everything! I enjoy him so much and love to hear about each new discovery, but at times it is frustrating. Jonas' favorite thing to do is to draw. He especially loves to create stories. It fasinates me to see how his mind works and to watch him draw and create. However, there's a little more going on in my life than Jonas' artwork. He calls to me throughout the day to come and look at what he's drawing and to ask me how to spell words so that he can write his stories. This can be time consuming and it's not always convinient to go to him. I've noticed lately when I'm in the middle of doing 15 things at once I get irritated and frustrated at going back and forth to him or answering his questions or commenting on his drawing or spelling words out for him. I want to encourage his passion for drawing and writing, but there are times when I definitely do it in the wrong spirit. When I answer Jonas right away and go to him every time he calls me for something it is feeding his will. Lately I've noticed him being very demanding when he calls to me. I'm trying to teach him patience. I want to answer him quickly and gently, but make him wait for me. I've also made him put his art stuff away several times during the day and go do something else so that he knows he's not in charge of anything- even his leisure. I'd appreciate your feedback and comments about this. How do you answer the demands of your children? How can we train our children through our answers to them? This journey of motherhood is a learning process. Let's encourage and help one another!